First post from a family of four....
There is so much that I want to say and so much that I want to remember about this last week (ish). I may have to do several posts as this hormonal post partum mommy is still a hot mess. lol. BTW - some of this post may be TMI or may make you uncomfortable....just a warning
Last Wednesday Matthew, Elliott and I traveled to Shelbyville to stay with my parents. I was scheduled for a c-section at 6 am on Thursday morning, which means we had to arrive at the hospital at 4am, which means we had to leave my parents house around 3:15am. I was thrilled about that. I didn't have to wait around all day and get anxious about it and by the time all of our family got up that morning and got ready baby boy would be here and they could all come meet him. I had started into contractions again early that Wednesday morning and the three hour drive only made them worse. I was a mess. Finally, that evening they eased off again and I was able to get a little bit of sleep before driving to the hospital.
The drive to the hospital was fairly quiet and we got in and registered and ready to go with very little trouble. I was very calm about this one, I guess knowing what to expect helps. As I arrived in the OR the nurses and the anesthesiologist and I began a conversation about gender reveal parties...which stemmed from them asking me baby boy's name. ( I didn't tell them either. lol) We laughed and joked, it was a very relaxed atmosphere. The epidural/spinal hurt a little more than I remembered from last time but I was glad to have it and it didn't last too long. My dr was talking to me from the other side of the curtain throughout the surgery...which is really funny. As the surgery began, I could tell something was very....different. Dr. Buck told me that baby boy was not in my pelvis at all. Which means that he hadn't dropped...at all. This was the reason we scheduled the c-section in the first place. We knew he hadn't engaged at all, but it was shocking to find that he hadn't even began the process as far along as I was.
I, of course, couldn't tell what was going on, but from the sensation I did have and the shadows from the curtain I would liken it to wrestling a bear. The assisting surgeon literally laid on top of my abdomen several times trying to push baby boy down while Dr. Buck tried to "catch him" as he swam by and pull him out. Needless to say, I was much more sore after this one. lol. He was finally born and I got concerned because he really didn't scream. He whimpered a little bit and that was all. He weighed a whopping 6 pounds 10 ounces and measured 18.5 inches long...and perfect.
The rest of that day is kind of a blur....the meds do that to you. I do remember Elliott coming in to meet him for the first time...it was precious. She has a doll that she carries everywhere - her name is"Nesis" (I don't know where she got it) she gave it to Drew because she said he needed it. HOW SWEET! (Of course, she needed it back for nap time, but still.)
Drew has done really well. He lost a lot of weight, of course, but he leveled out well and seems to be doing great. We go to our pediatrician here tomorrow to recheck his weight and check for a couple of other things. I have done okay, we have had a really hard time getting my blood sugar levels under control. At one point in the hospital my blood sugar was down to 49. That was after I had already had a snack of ice cream and orange juice. They shoved me full of glucose tabs, peanut butter, orange juice and milk. My OB came in and saw me and assessed me....but I don't remember any of it....at all. That is really scary to me. The high risk dr (or whoever was on call from that practice) came in one day during my stay, changed nothing, and refused to come in and see me my entire rest of the time there. My regular OB office dismissed them from caring for me. It was very interesting. I have regulated to the point that I am no longer bottoming out, but things still aren't back to a normal rhythm. I am going to see the internal medicine dr here next week to hopefully get it straightened out.
My biggest fear of this pregnancy was breastfeeding. I really believe in all of the benefits of breastfeeding and when I had Elliott I tried, but was fairly unsuccessful. She latched beautifully, but I wasn't informed enough to build up enough of a supply. So I ended up pumping/supplementing for 6 months, then switching to formula. Drew has kind of had the opposite problem. I have been able to get my supply going, but Drew has a really recessed chin and we are concerned about a possible tongue tie. The past few days he has been pretty much refusing to nurse at all. Every great once in a while we will have a good session or two, but it is very sporadic. This is breaking my heart. I want it to work so much. I haven't given up and we are still working at it, but I am very anxious about how it is all going to play out.
All of this has been exaggerated by the fact that two days ago my hormones hit the fan. I cry at pretty much everything. Seriously. I feel like I have cried all day....I'm crying now. Postpartum hormones are no joke. Yes I am taking something, yes I have already talked to the dr about it. I had PPD so bad with Elliott that I knew I didn't want to mess around this time. I know that there are more options and if what I am doing isn't working, we will keep trying.
I have missed Elliott something terrible while in the hospital. I am so glad to be back home and to try to get back to some reality and normalcy. My mom is here helping out, and I am so thankful. Elliott has really been clinging to my mom and kind of detached from me which is pushing this hormonal mom over the edge. I have been trying to get into our normal routine of me putting her down at night and getting some snuggles in throughout the day. I know things will get back to the way they normally are, it is just hard knowing that I have to find a new balance between feeding a newborn every couple of hours and playing with a busy toddler.
Drew is really sweet and snuggly. Elliott loves having him here. She is constantly wanting to "see baby Drew!". She loves on him and kisses him and it melts this mommy's heart....and makes me cry. lol.
Last Wednesday Matthew, Elliott and I traveled to Shelbyville to stay with my parents. I was scheduled for a c-section at 6 am on Thursday morning, which means we had to arrive at the hospital at 4am, which means we had to leave my parents house around 3:15am. I was thrilled about that. I didn't have to wait around all day and get anxious about it and by the time all of our family got up that morning and got ready baby boy would be here and they could all come meet him. I had started into contractions again early that Wednesday morning and the three hour drive only made them worse. I was a mess. Finally, that evening they eased off again and I was able to get a little bit of sleep before driving to the hospital.
The drive to the hospital was fairly quiet and we got in and registered and ready to go with very little trouble. I was very calm about this one, I guess knowing what to expect helps. As I arrived in the OR the nurses and the anesthesiologist and I began a conversation about gender reveal parties...which stemmed from them asking me baby boy's name. ( I didn't tell them either. lol) We laughed and joked, it was a very relaxed atmosphere. The epidural/spinal hurt a little more than I remembered from last time but I was glad to have it and it didn't last too long. My dr was talking to me from the other side of the curtain throughout the surgery...which is really funny. As the surgery began, I could tell something was very....different. Dr. Buck told me that baby boy was not in my pelvis at all. Which means that he hadn't dropped...at all. This was the reason we scheduled the c-section in the first place. We knew he hadn't engaged at all, but it was shocking to find that he hadn't even began the process as far along as I was.
I, of course, couldn't tell what was going on, but from the sensation I did have and the shadows from the curtain I would liken it to wrestling a bear. The assisting surgeon literally laid on top of my abdomen several times trying to push baby boy down while Dr. Buck tried to "catch him" as he swam by and pull him out. Needless to say, I was much more sore after this one. lol. He was finally born and I got concerned because he really didn't scream. He whimpered a little bit and that was all. He weighed a whopping 6 pounds 10 ounces and measured 18.5 inches long...and perfect.
The rest of that day is kind of a blur....the meds do that to you. I do remember Elliott coming in to meet him for the first time...it was precious. She has a doll that she carries everywhere - her name is"Nesis" (I don't know where she got it) she gave it to Drew because she said he needed it. HOW SWEET! (Of course, she needed it back for nap time, but still.)
Drew has done really well. He lost a lot of weight, of course, but he leveled out well and seems to be doing great. We go to our pediatrician here tomorrow to recheck his weight and check for a couple of other things. I have done okay, we have had a really hard time getting my blood sugar levels under control. At one point in the hospital my blood sugar was down to 49. That was after I had already had a snack of ice cream and orange juice. They shoved me full of glucose tabs, peanut butter, orange juice and milk. My OB came in and saw me and assessed me....but I don't remember any of it....at all. That is really scary to me. The high risk dr (or whoever was on call from that practice) came in one day during my stay, changed nothing, and refused to come in and see me my entire rest of the time there. My regular OB office dismissed them from caring for me. It was very interesting. I have regulated to the point that I am no longer bottoming out, but things still aren't back to a normal rhythm. I am going to see the internal medicine dr here next week to hopefully get it straightened out.
My biggest fear of this pregnancy was breastfeeding. I really believe in all of the benefits of breastfeeding and when I had Elliott I tried, but was fairly unsuccessful. She latched beautifully, but I wasn't informed enough to build up enough of a supply. So I ended up pumping/supplementing for 6 months, then switching to formula. Drew has kind of had the opposite problem. I have been able to get my supply going, but Drew has a really recessed chin and we are concerned about a possible tongue tie. The past few days he has been pretty much refusing to nurse at all. Every great once in a while we will have a good session or two, but it is very sporadic. This is breaking my heart. I want it to work so much. I haven't given up and we are still working at it, but I am very anxious about how it is all going to play out.
All of this has been exaggerated by the fact that two days ago my hormones hit the fan. I cry at pretty much everything. Seriously. I feel like I have cried all day....I'm crying now. Postpartum hormones are no joke. Yes I am taking something, yes I have already talked to the dr about it. I had PPD so bad with Elliott that I knew I didn't want to mess around this time. I know that there are more options and if what I am doing isn't working, we will keep trying.
I have missed Elliott something terrible while in the hospital. I am so glad to be back home and to try to get back to some reality and normalcy. My mom is here helping out, and I am so thankful. Elliott has really been clinging to my mom and kind of detached from me which is pushing this hormonal mom over the edge. I have been trying to get into our normal routine of me putting her down at night and getting some snuggles in throughout the day. I know things will get back to the way they normally are, it is just hard knowing that I have to find a new balance between feeding a newborn every couple of hours and playing with a busy toddler.
Drew is really sweet and snuggly. Elliott loves having him here. She is constantly wanting to "see baby Drew!". She loves on him and kisses him and it melts this mommy's heart....and makes me cry. lol.
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